What is Emotion Focused Couples Therapy or EFT? EFT is the only couples therapy model that has been shown to create lasting change in a couple’s argument cycle and emotional intimacy levels. EFT explores the root of each individual’s attachment history and the ways they communicate.
With me, you will look at the basic dynamic of; What sparked a reaction? What feeling came up? What thought or story pairs with that feeling? And finally, how are you handing that over to your partner, or in other words what was the behavior you displayed. While that can sound a little diagramy (I like made up feeling words), it provides a rich opportunity to learn how your person interprets certain actions and where those came free (surprise, your childhood!)
The more we explore and the more practice we gain at sharing in a healthy way, the more your brain actually changes and let’s you know your partner is safe, loving and there for you.
Those skills mixed with that brain change equals a secure attachment you and your person can lean on even when things get hard.